This is the first post in a series by Rabbi Laurie Matzkin designed for interfaith parents and mixed-heritage families raising Jewish children, exploring Jewish family life, or looking for accessible ways to bring Jewish stories, values, rituals, and questions into their homes. Interfaith and mixed-heritage families are central to the present and future of Jewish family life. These families are often seeking language, stories, rituals, and community connections that honor the fullness of their households while supporting meaningful Jewish identity for their children. This blog series is designed to support PJ Library families as they seek thoughtful, accessible, and family-centered ways to grow in their Jewish life at home.
“I worry that I’m not doing enough to help my children embrace their Jewish heritage. I appreciate how PJ Library helps me, especially since I didn’t grow up Jewish.” –A PJ Library parent
Building Jewish life as a family can feel a little like cooking together. In every kitchen, people have different roles. Someone may know the recipe. Someone else may bring the ingredients. Someone may stir, taste, set the timer, or remember how a grandparent used to make it. And sometimes, of course, people bump into each other. They disagree about what to add, how closely to follow the recipe, or what the final dish should taste like. This does not mean the meal is ruined. It means the family is making it together.
For parents raised in different faiths, Jewish family life can work that way too. One parent may bring Jewish memories. Another may bring curiosity, love, support, caution, or honest questions. Children may bring wonder. Grandparents and relatives may bring recipes, stories, songs, expectations, or a different holiday calendar.
Over time, your family notices what keeps coming back to the table. Jewish tradition has deep language for this kind of holy struggle. One of the names of the Jewish people, Israel, comes from the story of Jacob wrestling through the night and receiving a new name. Wrestling is part of our story.
When your family wrestles with questions of how to observe holidays, what rituals to adopt, what foods to eat in regard to your religious practices, what traditions to uphold, and other important questions related to faith, that wrestling is itself part of Jewish tradition. Your family can begin with the ingredients already at hand. You can ask questions. You can try something new. You can talk about what worked. You can adjust and return.
Maybe your family lights Shabbat candles and then orders takeout. Maybe you read a PJ Library book before a holiday and let your child’s questions guide the conversation. Maybe one parent sings the blessing, another sets the table, and someone else asks what the words mean. Maybe a grandparent’s recipe opens the door to a story your child will carry. Maybe another grandparent brings genuine curiosity, and the family discovers something new together.
Jewish family life grows through participation. It can be built with the family you actually have. Bumping elbows can be part of the process. So can tasting, adjusting, and trying again.
Like a family meal, your Jewish life will come together one ingredient at a time.
About the Author
Rabbi Laurie Matzkin is the Chief Jewish Experience Officer at the Peninsula Jewish Community Center in Foster City, California, and a Rukin Rabbinic Fellow with 18Doors. A former Family Educator for PJ Library in Silicon Valley, she loves helping families find language, stories, rituals, and questions that make Jewish life feel meaningful at home. A fifth-generation Bay Area native, Laurie lives with her husband, a local Jewish educator, and their two sons.
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What the Term “Interfaith Family” Means via 18Doors
October 5, 2026